Wells in the Desert of Your Marriage

Riding home from church last night, I was telling my sister-in-law my plans for Saturday.

“We are going to “The Word Shoppe Christmas Open House” and then to “Hobby Lobby” and I plan on getting to eat out and do a little Christmas shopping…”

“Christmas shopping?” my husband interrupted, “I don’t want to even think about Christmas until after Thanksgiving!”

And like a snake, the dialogue of the Christmas activities discussion/argument we have every year, jumped up to bite us.

Forgetting my sister-in-law and nephew in the back, I said in exasperation,


Softly, my sister-in-law said, “You can’t send him back. The warranty is expired and there are no returns.”


Marriage is like the Israelites 40 years in the desert. It’s hot, uncomfortable, exhausting, irritating, and you don’t see how your basic needs will be met. All along the way there are snakes that bite you, see Numbers 21:4-8.

“The Israelites may have been plagued by snakes for some time since there is no indication that the Lord took away the serpents as they had requested. Apparently, they carried the bronze snake with them, setting it up wherever they camped, and gave it a permanent location once they were in Canaan. It still existed during King Hezekiah’s reign; he destroyed it because the people had begun to worship it (2 Kings 18:4).  Jesus used the illustration of the bronze snake to illustrate the necessity of his crucifixion (John 3:14, 15).” ESV Hebrew-Greek Key Word Study Bible Notes

God provided a way to deal with those serpents – look to the cross.

Even in the desert, God provides an oasis.

Numbers 21:16-18, “And from there they continued to Beer; that is the well of which the Lord said to Moses, ‘Gather the people together so that I may give them water.’ Then Israel sang this song: ‘Spring up, O well! – Sing to it! – the well that the princes made, that the nobles of the people dug, with the scepter and with their staffs.” ESV

“…they might be in want of water, though they did not murmur as they had been used to do; and without their petition for it, the Lord promises to give it to them…” Gil’s Exposition of the Entire Bible, see here.

Not only did they refrain from murmuring, they had to work for it.

“…they were told to dig for water instead of receiving it from the rock, showed the end to be at hand and the transition shortly to be made from miraculous to natural supplies.” Pulpit Commentary, see here.

Especially during transitions, we have to give each other grace…and space.

“To be happy in a relationship, you must give each other space…Love is like a plant; when you smother it, it dies, but when you give it air, it thrives…There’s only one person who can “fix” you and that’s God. As you become more spiritually healthy, you’ll become more emotionally healthy and when that happens you’re more apt to find your needs being met.” www.facebook.com/TheWordForYouTodayUSA/

Dear Lord,

Thank you for always being there. The closer I get to you, the closer I feel to David. Thank you for forgiveness and that you love me just the way I am. Thank you for patience. Please send a little extra to David…he’s going to need it. 



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